Friday, July 31, 2009

How I Rate Beers

How I Rate Beers

No doubt this is a pressing question for all of my readers, 15 in total. I am not a professional, nor amateur, beer tasting judge. There is currently no desire to be one either. My goal is to try and impart impressions of a beer by my reactions. This unfortunately gives a very biased view. If you are not pleased with my rating scale, I encourage you to look under my foot for a resolution.

Taste is measured on a scale of -5 to +5

I do not try any beers that I know will get a negative number. Life is too short for bad beer. Here is my rating scale for taste based upon my reactions:

+5 OMFG I want more
+4 Wow, this tastes better than the Swedish stewardess I once dated
+3 Oh ,very nice and tasty
+2 I'll have another, I’ll even buy
+1 I will have another one, if you are buying
0 maybe it is better than water
-1 Well, at least I didn't buy it
-2 Good thing to contains alcohol
-3 I had another beer like this once, ONLY once
-4 EWW, did you spit in my beer
-5 I wouldn't pour this swill in my plants, let alone my mouth

Aftertaste is a simpler scale, -2 to +2
+2 Good Long
+1 Good
0 None
-1 Bad
-2 Bad Lingering

Alcohol Content is simply by the numbers:
-1 less than 5%

0 5-5.9%
+1 6% or more

Value is either:
+1 yes I would buy it again
0 no I would not buy it again
-1 I want my money back.

Ingame Enhancement is based upon the gaming session experienced while drinking this beer. Beer always either enhances or inhibits gaming quality. I often use this criteria to bump up a score if needed.
+1 I owned and had fun
0 average gaming night
-1 I got owned or too many noobs playing

That's it; very scientific. I would like to add that this rating scale is protected by creative commons copyright. This is probably not necessary, I can't think of any reason why someone would want to use this stupid rating scale. If you want to go ahead and link credits back to me.

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