No preamble here; gotta get through these notebooks.

Stone Smoked Porter = 8/10

Ratebeer 3.8/5 99th percentile
Beer Advocate 91%

Even the Boy Scouts could not make a campfire that smells this good. Voluminous amounts of ash, campfire, bittersweet chocolate, coffee and Girl Guide aromas are released by the bottle opener. Every sip is like a burnt s'more: bacon, rich chocolate, coffee, vanilla and cocoa powder. The more you drink, the more you taste. This stuff never ends; the slick, powdery finish talks of a hot chocolate chaser. STELLAR BEER.

Taste +4
Aftertaste +2
Alcohol Content 0 5.9%
Value +1
Appearance +1 (it is always fun to read the silkscreened story on the back)

Other Porter Reviews
Black Boss Porter
Black Death Porter (Russell)
Double Mocha Porter (Rogue)

I like anything wood aged. The wood just gives an added dimension to the flavours: vanilla, tannins and sherry. I would wood age soy milk if the wife would let me.
Oaked Arrogant Bastard Ale = 9/10
Ratebeer 3.84 99th percentile
Beer Advocate A-

Anyone who has tried an Arrogant Bastard will remember the flavours: grapefruit citrus, resin and toffee. I'm sure many people buy this beer because of the catchy name. The wood aging gives an extra layer of flavours: vanilla, roast, tannins and (obviously) oak. Bready and toffee malts try very hard to keep this hop monster in check. Upfront is quite bitter but not pucking; it is oddly smooth for such a high ABV beer. Every sip leaves a long lingering of astringent citrus notes.

Taste +4
Aftertaste +2
Alcohol Content +1 7.2%
Value +1
Appearance +1 (great looking silk screened bottle - I kept it)

Pike Entire Wood Aged Stout 2009
Dogfish Head Burton Baton
Innis and Gunn Canadian Cask 2009

Ratebeer 3.52 94th percentile
Beer Advocate B+

Taste +5

• Glorious sweet grapefruit/citrus nose
• colour is deep amber/red with light tan head
• very hop assertive with good blast of citrus that fades to reveal a thin and thin lightly toasted bready malt
• very cooling on tongue like menthol
  

Aftertaste +2

• citrus hops leave a light/slick coating on tongue
• long menthol coolness
  

Alcohol Content -1 4.4%

This should really be considered a plus

Value +1

Now this is a true session ale.

Ingame Enhancement +1

I really gotta change this category, but I must bump this beer's score up.

Overall 8/10

This is a great low alcohol ale with lots of the hop flavours we all crave.

Saison du Buff

Stone Vertical Epic 9/9/9

Ratebeer 3.72 95th percentile
Beer Advocate A-

This is the most complex and tasty beers I have ever tasted. Normally a beer takes up a 1/2 page in my notebook. Stone Epic took up a full page of descriptions.

Taste +5

There is so much going on I must use point form.
Nose: vanilla, roast and wood, bitter chocolate.
Tastes: bitter chocolate,Stoli vanilla vodka, oak, bitter coffee, vague citrus.
The mouth feel was rich, full and oddly creamy

Aftertaste +2

All the flavours mixed together with a nice, long alcohol burn.

Alcohol Content +1 8.9%

The alcohol could be tasted and blended in well.

Value +1

WOW!
Ingame Enhancement +1

Very few beers knock me on my arse flavour wise and alcohol wise.

Overall 10/10

This is a limited release; if you see it get two or three. If not you will have to wait for 10/10/10.

Palo Santo Marron and Blog Integrity
Rochefort 10 and Believable Privates
Mikkell Beer Geek Weasel

India Pale Ale (Stone Brewing)

Ratebeer 4.0 99th percentile
Beer Advocate A

Taste +4

Woah, this one has a huge dry hoppy nose; not floral, more on the citrus/spicy side. The taste is most unexpected; almost a creamy hop bitterness. These hops are piney with grapefruit and vanilla mixed in for good measure. Overall the mouthfeel is almost buttery.

Aftertaste +2

Your whole mouth is left coated with this glorious smooth, citrus hop bitterness.

Alcohol Content +1 6.9%

I'm sure there is ethanol in the flavours somewhere, but the hop hides everything.

Value +1

If I ever see it again, I will buy two.

Ingame Enhancement +1

A glorious interruption to the macro-brew swill that I was drinking all week.

Overall 9/10

One of the best IPA's I have tried. On par with the Green Flash and Dogfish Head 90min IPA.

Arrogant Bastard Ale (Stone Brewing)

Ratebeer 3.93 99th percentile
Beer Advocate A-

Taste +3

BAM, as soon as you open the bottle the nose of floral hops, light citrus fruits and alcohol fills the room. This is one complicated beer; huge grapefruit and pine hops, roasted malts and weak coffee. If you can get past the oily bitterness, it is a great beer. Not a smooth drinking beer, its a little stinging.

Aftertaste +2

The bitter hops slips down your gullet, warming and burning all the way down. The residue is a warm coffee and tart malt.
Alcohol Content +1 7.2%

Value +1

This is one of the best ales I have ever tried. Sort of a mix between porter and IPA.

Ingame Enhancement +1

I found this beer in the scuzziest CBAW ever. Their dusty wine selection was stored in a yellow milk crate on the floor. They even sold tequila that came in a glass gun. You could almost see the line from the door to the BUD Light cooler.
Overall 8/10 BOOM HEADSHOT

I have had this beer before and remember it being just as complex. If you like your beers strong, hoppy and complex, then look no further. It has a catchy name also.

Meterman: So how is life as an admin?
Flavius: Players know the power I wield! They play differently when I am around.
M: They are giving you space because all the friendly fire you dish out.
F: No Way! It is the fear of being banned.
M: No, it is the fear when you accidentally shoot an alarmed car in expert mode.

Imperial Russian Stout Spring 2007 (Stone Brewing)

Rate Beer 4.22 100th percentile
Beer Advocate A

Taste +4

The nose is just as expected from an imperial stout; coffee, bitter chocolate, molasses and alcohol. To ingest this brew is a little challenging; you must chew it! It feels in the mouth like an espresso infused dark chocolate bar. There is a certain smoothness within this beer; despite the heavy alcohol tingle that travels all over the mouth. I must not forget to mention the roasted malt and black currant flavours.

Aftertaste +1

The roasted malt fades away to leave that mouth coating bitter chocolate. Sadly, the aftertaste is not long enough. It calls you and begs you to drink again.

Alcohol Content +1 10.8%

Ouch! It is hard to taste the booze on this one. Luckily this is a thick, sipping beer. If this one were easy to chug, there would be problems.

Value +1

This is one of the greatest beers I have every tried; I will purchase immediately upon sight.
Ingame Enhancement +1

I had this beer after riding the California Screaming roller coaster with my father. There is a certain satisfaction in hearing your father scream like a little girl.

Overall 8/10 BOOM HEADSHOT

This is a sinfully delicious beer. Anyone who is a fan of the thick stout style will love it.

Flavius: I didn't get the Tim Hortons job.
Meterman: Shocking. Lets try to improve your interview questions.
M:"What was you last employer's opinion of you?"
F:Very low, his last words to me were, "I never want to see your ugly face again."
M:"What do you see as most attractive about the job?"
F: The lack of responsibility, subervision and little accountability.
M:"What are your long term goals"
F: Try to reduce my number of court appearances.
M: I find it hard to believe you are unemployed.


Bitter Chocolate Oatmeal Stout (12th Anniversary) by Stone Brewing
Ratebeer.com 3.85 97th Percentile
BeerAdvocate.com A-

This was an impulse buy at a Whole Foods in Las Vegas. I am truly a sucker for oatmeal stouts and cool looking bottles.

Taste +4

Ouch, this is a full-on oatmeal stout; sharp bitter chocolate and coffee/espresso flavours hit you right away. The nose is of burnt toast and ethanol. It feels almost as thick as oatmeal when you drink it.

Aftertaste +2

Very impressive finish; once the bitter chocolate and coffee fades you can pick up hints of raisins, vanilla and so many more.

Alcohol +1 9.2%

You can sure taste it on this one. The flavour seems right at home with this strong tasting beer.

Value 0

If you factor in airfare, Whole Paycheck markup and travel time this gets to be one expensive beer.

Ingame Enhancement +1

This night was the monthly Clan ARC PS3 Gran Turismo and beers night (a.k.a drinking and driving). It was also a plus because Meterman didn't wake up nauseatingly hung over.

8/10 BOOM ZOMBIESHOT

This review is a little bit biased, stouts are my favourite beer. This one certainly made into the top five.